So, it turns out planning ahead actually does make a difference.
Yesterday I outlined a daily routine, based on priorities and intuition. It’s very detailed and structures my day from the moment I get up till the moment I turn off the lights. It is not intended to be followed to a tee, but rather something to refer to when I feel lost und undecided. Just having the list makes me make more of my time and provides me with a lingering sense of purpose. Despite not being able to do even half of the things like I had written them down I had a fantastically productive and eventful day with almost no mind-numbing digression. I worked on my website, made calls, paid bills, took a nap. Didn’t get stuck on Youtube or watching TV. This, right now? That’s the sensation of feeling like a proper human being.
An hour ago I witnessed an invigorating talk about self-determination by Marianne Gronemeyer, inspired by the teachings of Ivan Illich. She has a way with words, that woman. Not that her talk was fascinating only on grounds of aesthetics. To the contrary. Her talk seemed lighter than its complexity would let one assume. But boy did it convey some complex thoughts! Just very elegantly put, is all.
A while ago I sang at the wedding ceremony of a friend of mine. He and his wife surprised me with a 50 Euro voucher for Amazon a few weeks later. I thought about getting programming books, but I think I’ll get some Spinoza, Adorno, and, well, Ivan Illich instead.
After about two and a half weeks of not drinking, I finally feel stoked about getting smart again.