Back from normality


For the past two weeks I’ve been almost constantly surrounded by people. First by my brother’s family, with whom I spent Christmas. Then by friends, celebrating the New Year. I had a couple from Croatia over for a few days who I showed around my hometown and Vienna. I think I was a good host. I even cleaned and tidied up my room for them. It has never looked this nice since my mother stopped cleaning up after me. She’ll be impressed when she sees it.
Now it’s back to solitude and I can focus on my creative endeavors again. I’m looking forward to making a lot of music this year and to working on my little web app I’ve been designing in my head for a few weeks now. In order to achieve my goals consistency will be key. The same goes for working out and getting lean. No alcohol for six months. I did it last year, and I found it interesting, so I’m doing it again this year.
Today I starting working on my college assignments again. Then I did some programming for my web project. The latter had me realize what a terrible coder I am. I really have no clue what I’m doing. But I hope that by the time this thing is finished I will have improved a lot in this regard.
Shortly before I went to visit my brother my car battery died on me. Today I removed it from my car so I could recharge it in our garage. It felt good to hold actual tools in my hands for once, instead of sitting in front of Photoshop, a sequencer or some text editor. I’d like to do this more often.
The beginning of this year feels great. I feel confident and optimistic. That’s so different from last year, it blows my mind. I thank myself for the decision to seek out therapy instead of killing myself one year ago, and I thank my friends for their understanding and care. I am truly a lucky man.